More Angst, Poetic Angst This Time...With a Twilight Reference LOL

    love? hate?    21/08/09
    
You didn't help me as much as you think you did.
Once you helped me.
Of the many times you tried.

But remember if not for you, I wouldn't be like i am now.
You are the reason i hurt so much.
Anytime I see you,
Hear you,
Or am reminded of you.

I am like Bella Swan, you are my Edward.
Only instead of my Edward leaving me,
I was the one to leave you.

I clutch at my ribcage,
Trying to hold myself together,
So I don't fall apart.

It hurts so much that I sit there,
Alone.
Wailing to myself.
The tears flowing.
My whole self heaving with the sobs.

Still I put on the brave face.
The mask that hides the truth,
The hard shell that protects my soft insides.

I pretend that its easy,
I lie.
To myself, to my friends, to my family.
I lie.
Until I start to believe it.
I lie.

This seems a love hate relationship,
I love you?
I hate you?
You love me?
You hate me?